The day was nothing special, an ordinary rainy day.
I didn’t know that I would be afraid to fall asleep in the evening.
For sometimes, I’m dying at night.
I have died in the dreams of others and in those of my own.
So, it would not be the first time.
Does every human has his own death –one and only,
as everyone has their own lives?
Or it is one and the same for all,
and takes us one by one when our turn comes?
I do not know, but one thing is certain:
when I find out, it will be too late
and I will not be able to tell anyone.
None of the living, that is.
I want her to take my hand and transfer me to the other side,
painlessly and without toll. It just so happened . . .
Let me out of this world, this lie, out of this fuss
which is hard to bear! I’m a weak man,
nobody and nothing. But I don’t give up. As long as the heart is beating
I will push. A stone or whatever it may be, I will push.
I have to get somewhere.
Both I, and everyone else.
I didn’t know that I would be afraid to fall asleep in the evening.
For sometimes, I’m dying at night.
I have died in the dreams of others and in those of my own.
So, it would not be the first time.
Does every human has his own death –one and only,
as everyone has their own lives?
Or it is one and the same for all,
and takes us one by one when our turn comes?
I do not know, but one thing is certain:
when I find out, it will be too late
and I will not be able to tell anyone.
None of the living, that is.
I want her to take my hand and transfer me to the other side,
painlessly and without toll. It just so happened . . .
Let me out of this world, this lie, out of this fuss
which is hard to bear! I’m a weak man,
nobody and nothing. But I don’t give up. As long as the heart is beating
I will push. A stone or whatever it may be, I will push.
I have to get somewhere.
Both I, and everyone else.
Tihomir Jančovski (born 1967) Macedonia
Translator not stated
Source: Blesok no. 119
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